Serious Thinks Thought Here

Probably. However, when I run naked, you only want it to be forward. Trust me.

What is, “My idea of the makings of a bitchin’ party”, Alex?

Hey, that’s my shopping list for Costco!

Yes, and on a related note, I once starred in a Blaxploitation movie titled, “Jew Wanna Get Down?!”

It was seen by hundreds.

I’m sorry, that’s the answer to the question, “Why did Joe Lieberman switch political parties?”

I fail to see what my father has to do with any of this.

Wait, don’t tell me…the opening line of Chapter 1 of Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone!

No?

How about The Lorax And Other Creepy Tales by Dr. Suess (who wasn’t even a real M.D., how creepy is that?)

Centigrade? Again with the metric system? Gretchen, you’re never going to make ‘the metric system’ happen!

This is first time any women responded to any of my questions, other than with “Under no circumstances will I ever go out with you.”

This explains why I did so poorly on those math exams in high school. I always thought I had to include numbers in my answers. What a maroon I was.